Oil Pastels
by mugglecastlover31
Summary: Pam watches wistfully as Phyllis receives gift after gift on Valentine's Day. Jim notices. My version of 2x16 Valentine's Day. Angst ridden.


A/N: My first Office story! It's my take on episode 2x16, Valentine's Day. Yes, it's way in the past, and Jim and Pam are adorable and together now. But I really couldn't resist the angst!

Thanks as always to my beta WinterBaby19 for editing!

Disclaimer: I do not own the Office. Or else Jim and I would be married…

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Oil Pastels

She never wore her hair down. Today it was down with a little headband. She looked absolutely beautiful. He wanted to tell her. Just march straight up to her and say, "You look beautiful." But it wasn't his place to say. Especially not today. Not on Valentine's Day.

_Maybe she was expecting too much. She had told Roy not to get her anything expensive today because they were saving for the wedding. But still, couldn't he at least send her some flowers?_

He couldn't save her today. It was Valentine's Day and he had no place giving her a present. He wasn't her boyfriend. Just a friend, he was just a friend. It wasn't Jim and Pam. It was Roy and Pam.

_Flowers, chocolates, flowers, and teddy bears. All for Phyllis, none for Pam. Couldn't her fiancé manage something? At the very least she had expected a card. Pam wasn't much of a romantic – her girlish notions of romance had been tossed away during her relationship with Roy. He wasn't that type of guy. Well, he wasn't that type of romantic. She wondered if Jim…Well, it wasn't her place to wonder any such thing._

He saw Roy walk in and almost lost it. He carried no flowers, no present. From across the room Jim could feel the disappointment emanating from her. Didn't Roy feel that disappointment? Didn't Roy realize how lucky he was to have her? Jim lived everyday wishing that he was the one kissing the girl at reception. He would give anything to have her. Where Roy gave her a sweater, Jim had given her a teal teapot full of memories. How could Roy be so oblivious?

_She stole a glance at Jim. Would he be spending tonight with someone? The idea made her a little uncomfortable. But she closed that part of her brain. Jim was her best friend. Of course she wanted him to find love. _

_Right?_

It was almost five: time to leave. Still there was no present for Pam, no token of love. Damn it Roy! Jim stood up and put his coat on. Smiling at Pam, he said, "Happy Valentine's Day," and walked out of the office.

_She smiled back and was left speechless in his wake. What now? 'What were you expecting Pam?' she thought to herself. 'He's probably got someone else to spend the evening with, remember?' And she was going home to Roy._

Jim pushed away the fact that this was yet another Valentine's Day he would spend without Pam. Instead he'd be spending it with some friends and playing poker. He had thought about going on a date with a girl his brother had told him about. But the more he thought about it, the more he knew that he couldn't stand spending Valentine's Day with another girl. He had no motivation to spend the evening with a girl if it wasn't with the one who truly mattered.

_Pam put on her coat and stepped out into the cold Scranton air. She didn't want to go home. She didn't want to be with Roy when he hadn't done anything for her. He hadn't even said, "I love you."_

He wished he could just tell her. Just say, "I love you, Pam Beesly!" Why was he such a coward? Maybe because of June 10th. There was a date now. It loomed in the future like the apocalypse. Now would be the time to say it. But he couldn't. Maybe that love wasn't his to ask for.

_There was something on the windshield of her car. It was a package wrapped in shiny red paper. It was too good to be true. Finally! She knew there was a reason she loved Roy! She opened the gift and out came a brand new pack of high quality oil pastels. This was exactly what she needed! Just the other day at lunch she had been telling Jim – Wait. She ripped open the card and confirmation came instantly. Three words and a name were written inside:_

Happy Valentine's Day!

— Jim

_Tears sprang unbidden to her eyes as a smile came to her lips. Jim…who else listened to her enough to know that she needed new oil pastels? Who else knew her well enough to know…well everything. Only Jim. Only he knew that her favorite kind of yogurt was mixed berry. And that she wanted a teapot for Christmas. Jim pushed her towards her aspirations of becoming an artist. Roy held her back. But she couldn't think about such things. Roy was her fiancé; Jim was her best friend. Best friend…That was it._

Jim wondered if Pam had appreciated the oil pastels. He hoped she loved them.

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Reviews are always appreciated!


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